Chapter 30: The Night Sky is Lonely, Dawn is Gentle

Lin Shenlu walked alone, quietly making her way upward.

It was eleven o’clock.

Everything around her was silent. Only the different courtyards were ablaze with light, but there was no one in sight.

A faint sense of loneliness crept over Lin Shenlu.

She lit a cigarette and stood on the steps, gently blowing smoke rings toward the moon.

In the dim night, amidst the glow from the surrounding courtyards, the air was thick with the fragrance of blooming flowers.

Suddenly, a line of poetry by Gu Cheng drifted into her mind.

The flowers have bloomed. Everywhere is awash with blossoms. And then, all at once, everything becomes lonely.

…

When she reached the entrance of the Blue Whale Inn, the roses that had flourished by day now quietly absorbed the moon’s essence.

In the moonlight, the gentle gaze of the stag looked up at the blue whale suspended high above.

Lin Shenlu’s own eyes softened as well.

She pushed the door open softly and entered the courtyard.

The lights were still on in the first-floor hall, but the laughter and merriment from earlier had vanished.

All the guests, the staff, and even Hailan Jing, who had been livestreaming, were nowhere to be found.

Perhaps the bustling night had ended, and with it, everyone had dispersed.

In truth, a quiet place is not inherently lonely.

Loneliness is what lingers after sudden silence falls upon a place once filled with joy.

She passed the pool and crossed the first floor, feeling an urge to see the view from the rooftop.

To admire the night over Erhai from such a vantage point must be beautiful.

Surrounded by darkness, Lin Shenlu climbed the stairs, her steps light and solitary.

How wonderful the night is, she mused.

No one to bother her, no one to disturb; alone, she felt utterly free.

It was just that the tranquility seemed to heighten the loneliness.

When she reached the rooftop, the view was indeed breathtaking.

Though night had fallen, the flowers remained in bloom, the surface of the lake shimmered in moonlight, and the swing swayed gently.

A figure in black sat quietly on the swing, as if lost in thought.

Who could it be?

Who else, on such a night, lingered in the darkness like her?

Lin Shenlu leaned softly against the wall, placed a cigarette between her lips, and lit it.

The flick of the lighter seemed to startle the figure on the swing.

The figure turned, and in the darkness, caught sight of a small spark.

The flame vanished in an instant, but the ember of the cigarette glowed on, faint yet persistent, illuminating the shadows.

“Lin Shenlu?” a voice suddenly asked.

She nodded and walked toward the water.

“It’s you? Stargazing alone?” Lin Shenlu asked.

By the faint light, she could see clearly now: Hailan Jing was seated on the swing, dressed in a white and blue princess gown, thicker than the one she’d worn during the day. Her hair fell to either side, crowned with a garland of white, pale green, and soft pink flowers.

A sprite princess of the night, perhaps?

“Stargazing is wonderful. Since childhood, I’ve always watched over the stars alone,” Hailan Jing replied as she stepped off the swing.

Bathed in moonlight, she seemed to walk across the water.

Lin Shenlu nearly choked on her cigarette.

He felt as though he’d met another soul as solitary as himself in the darkness.

“Why are you back so late? Where did you go?” Hailan Jing asked, coming to stand beside him.

“I went to the ancient city of Dali to drink away my troubles. The night wind sobered me up on my way back,” Lin Shenlu replied.

“Drinking to forget? I don’t think those who seek oblivion ever truly succeed,” Hailan Jing laughed.

She walked softly to a nearby flower arbor and pressed a switch.

Ground lights cast a gentle glow over the space, revealing a modest tea table in the arbor.

“Care for some tea after your wine?” Hailan Jing asked, sitting across from him.

Seeing the ashtray on the table, Lin Shenlu nodded.

“I saw you livestreaming earlier. Why did you end the broadcast and come here to feel the breeze alone?” he asked, extinguishing his cigarette in the ashtray.

“Livestreaming… It’s become a habit, a job. Without it, life would seem even more meaningless,” Hailan Jing replied. After a pause, she continued, “You know, my stream is always lively, everyone discussing the topics I like. I always smile at them, and yet, in that very moment, loneliness surges from every direction to swallow me whole…”

Lin Shenlu sighed.

A true wanderer, adrift and alone.

Hailan Jing sighed as well, pouring tea and sharing it with Lin Shenlu.

“No one keeps me company into the deep night; no one shares a drink with me… Come, let’s toast to that!” Hailan Jing raised her teacup and clinked it with his.

Lin Shenlu found her quite intriguing.

A young woman of considerable means, yet so burdened with cares?

“With everything you have, you shouldn’t be so depressed,” Lin Shenlu said after a sip of tea. After a moment, he continued, “It’s hard to imagine someone like you feeling so oppressed.”

“A girl… hahaha…” Hailan Jing laughed, then asked, “Let me ask you, is a girl who can’t even afford to break down without considering the consequences mature, or simply powerless?”

Lin Shenlu was silent.

“That’s why I love the night and the sky,” Hailan Jing said, gazing upward. “Tell me, the sky holds nothing, yet why does it comfort me?”

“The sky has stars, the moon, and clouds. Everything in life has its own uniqueness. Kites have the wind, dolphins have the sea—everyone finds their own place,” Lin Shenlu replied with a wave of his hand.

Seeing Hailan Jing lost in thought, he continued, “Look at you: you have your ideal Santorini-like hotel, millions of fans, friends and family in your stream—how can you say you have nothing?”

Hailan Jing shook her head.

“It’s not the same. You know what I mean—it’s about someone who truly cares for you, someone who is your only one,” she said stubbornly.

Lin Shenlu smiled and leaned back in his chair.

He lit another cigarette.

“You overthink things. In this world, no one really cares about you, unless you’re beautiful or on the verge of death,” he said. After a pause, he continued, “Look at your current attitude toward life. Only those who love themselves are loved by others. Do you enjoy your loneliness? Don’t you always feel, in your most helpless and solitary moments, that there’s no one behind you?”

“Doesn’t it feel like every night falls asleep on your pillow, while you alone remain awake?” he asked, watching her in silence.

He went on, “So, you’re not the saddest person I’ve met. The truly heartbroken can’t even shed a single tear…”

“You’re just bored, weary of a life that feels meaningless and dull, lacking excitement. What you feel is emptiness, is ennui—not true loneliness.”

Setting his teacup down, Lin Shenlu stood, ready to leave.

“I, too, am someone who embraces solitude in the night, but I wait for the dawn, for gentleness to return,” he said, and with that, he departed.

Leaving Hailan Jing alone, still keeping watch over the stars through the ages.

She remained there until Lin Shenlu had disappeared from sight.

Only then did she come to herself.

“Who are you calling lonely and empty?”